We have had quite a busy day! The babies are 3 months old today. I know, I can’t believe it either! I took them to Olan Mills for their complementary portrait package for new babies born at our hospital. They wore the outfits from Thanksgiving… you know, Marissa’s adorable dress and Zach’s psychatrist outfit. Go back 2 posts to check them out. (Matt says Zach looks like a psychiatrist because the jeans say “approachable” and the sweater vest says “professional”). My brother pointed out that vests are always a form of protection. Bullet-proof vests protect you from getting shot, life-jackets protect you from drowning, and sweater vests protect you from pretty girls. I forget where he got that quote, but thank goodness Zach is protected from pretty girls! That is going to come in handy for his worry-prone mother!
Anyway, so we went and got some adorable pictures and the babies were angels. Tired, hungry, poopy-diapered, stinky little angels. I fully expected them to explode at any time, but they were amazing and sweet for all of it! My friend Erika has volunteered her time several times now to be my second set of hands whenever I manage to get out our front door, and she was SO helpful! The babies would tip over or roll (they are working on rolling side to side) and we’d have to run in and invade the shot to rescue them. Besides, for those looks-like-they-can-stand/sit/stay put shots that have a parent’s invisible hand hidden somewhere supporting the tushie, I can only hold up one baby at a time! Thank you, Erika!
Then we went to see our pediatrician. No, it wasn’t a well-baby 3 month visit. Instead, Marissa has been projectile vomiting a whole meal every other day for a week, then it started happening every day. Otherwise, she has been the picture of health and smiles. I called because they always say puking and urping are fine, as long as the baby is gaining weight and isn’t projectile vomiting. They wanted to see her, so we went straight there after the photos. She’s fine. We have warning signs to watch for and a couple ideas for helping her not do this anymore, but for now, she is gaining weight very well, peeing as often as we’d hope and actually is the picture of health. After her hernia surgery next week, I think things will calm down nicely!
I forget that not everyone knows that we breastfeed via breast pump around here and that it works really well for us. So our doctor asks if I’m breastfeeding, and I say yes I am, in bottles, with a bit of formula supplement in each bottle because I can’t keep up with the babies anymore. He seemed confused and wanted to know how I could know I wasn’t making enough milk because he thought they were taking it straight from me (it is a confusing issue… I feel like I make plenty of milk, but I can only feed 2 little growing peeps on my own for so long!) I said, “well, because I pump and put it in bottles.”
“Oh, why? Maybe if you breastfed them, you’d make more milk… but I’ve obviously never done it and hey, I’m glad you know what works for you.” I’m so glad he said it that way, but it makes me sigh because I will tell you that I can’t possibly produce more milk, even if I velcroed the babies to me and wore them around 24/7 working their baby magic on my maternal instincts, because I am making my maximum amount! I log it every day and keep track of what they eat and it’s all rather well-documented. So I explained and then left and ate ice cream because it helps me cope with hard questions. Matt jokingly asked if I need to consider quitting him again. No, no, I said. Then all my good work on improving my working relationship with his now very helpful nurse would be wasted! 🙂
Bottom line: Shawna is right. If you are the parents, then you make decisions that are best for your family and then you either explain that every time someone asks or stop explaining and just smile, but you STILL make the decisions that are best for your family. I’m happy to report that I no longer feel like apologizing for doing things differently! I’ve grown in accepting my best as good enough and it’s nice. I just have to look at these two healthy cuties to be affirmed these days. I’m finding that having confidence doesn’t mean that I think I’m doing a perfect job, because I’m not and there are SO many things I would file away to try differently if given a next time! But I have to do what I can and not do what I can’t and be okay with it! Otherwise, life would not be full of little joys that come up unexpectedly… it would just be a crappy to do list of ways I’m failing. I can’t really live like that.
Although for me, milk production was way better when he was nursing vs. the pump, everybody does their own thing and as long as you are loving them and staying halfway sane, you are ahead of the game. I’m so glad that the doctor put it in those terms, too, because it kinda falls under my female-only OB/GYN philsophy. That being you wouldn’t go to a dentist who didn’t have any teeth!
What day is the surgery so I will know to say an extra prayer for your little fruit?
Ah, your philosophy made me laugh out loud. Totally! Monday morning, and thanks! I’m most concerned that it might hurt her to ride in her carseat for 3+ long hours on the way home since the buckles sit right where her incision will be. I imagine they will still have her doped up or something, but I’m not really sure what to expect.
You’re doing really great with the breastfeeding. I know firsthand from my job that a huge proportion of women can’t or don’t breastfeed at all, and a lot of those that do are having to add formula into the feeds before they even get out of the hospital. I think doctors/nurses/midwives put way too much pressure on women and make them feel like if they don’t breastfeed their children will grow up to be characters from “My Name Is Earl”. It’s just not true. You’re doing what works, and you’re doing an exceptional job, especially considering you have two whole little people instead of just one.
Hey! I was reading your entry and the quote from your brother about sweater vests protecting you from pretty girls comes from a comedian by the name of Demetri Martin. I happened to be watching some of his stuff on youtube yesterday and he told that joke in one of the clips.
It was great getting to meet the twins last weekend. I hope you’re doing well. Andy told me about your blog and gave me the link. I like to read it to procrastinate at work.